Feeling like I don't quite belong

In this conversation, the three of us disclose the confusion that comes along with identifying with multiple backgrounds and the difficulties that arise with being a person of color in America.

Sarah / Eid 2004
Defintion
insert definition here
Sarah / Eid 2002
Too American
Sarah  
Have you ever felt that you’ve been treated differently because of your race?

Patricia  
I think sometimes people expected me to be smarter in some subjects because I’m Asian. But overall I haven’t really experienced racism in college. When I was younger, a lot of people made insensitive comments. They would ask if I was Japanese or Chinese, even though I was Korean, or they would make fun of my culture. But I think now people are more accepting, so I don't experience racism as much. But maybe, I also don’t experience it as much because I surround myself with more Asians than other ethnicities, since I feel more comfortable with them. It’s possible that if I was in a more white-dominant community, my experience would be different, but I can't really speak to that.

Do you guys have any stories of when you were treated differently because of your race?

Sarah  
It's weird because most of my friends are not of the same ethnicity or background as me. But I don't feel as if I’ve directly experienced racism, but I definitely notice when I'm the only brown person, more now than I used to.

Raziah  
That's good to hear! That’s such a nice place to be at in terms of your own identity.

Patricia
Yeah, that's a good way of thinking about it. I'm curious, what about you, Raziah?

Raziah  
I would say, growing up I wanted to look more East Asian. Since I grew up in Malaysia, I wanted to look more like everyone else. And the beauty standard there was a blend of American/European and East Asian beauty standards. I didn’t like looking like me, because there was no way I could pass for either American or East Asian. It's just so funny though, because people there usually have flatter noses, so looking at me they would say, “it's good that you have a tall nose”. But people made fun of it too, because my nose was maybe too tall.

SS   So interesting.

RA   And I don't think I ever wanted to be white. I just wanted to have a smaller nose. Because I think that was the main characteristic of my culture that’s such a distinguishing factor. When people would see me without the hijab, they would tell me that I could pass for a white person if it wasn’t for my nose.

SS   Really?

RA   Yeah, besides the nose part though I just wanted to be able to go out more, and have that sense of freedom that I saw more white kids have. And I understand, we came from a different culture, so that wasn’t common for my parents.

SS   Yeah, it's the mentality of, “that's not what we do.”

RA   Yeah! And I also get a little bothered when people make curry jokes. It gets kinda upsetting, but also a little boring. *laughs* That’s all the jokes they can come up with. And as a kid, I would be that one brown kid that would just wear my cultural clothes and go play outside, no fucks given. And initially the other kids would say, “why does she dress like that?” and make comments about it. But also, a lot of it was just kids being kids, and I don't think it was ill-intended.

SS   Oh yeah, I definitely experienced a similar thing with curry comments. But going off of the cultural clothes thing, in elementary school when we had picture day I used to wear my cute Indian outfit sometimes.

RA   That’s so cute!

PL   That is adorable *laughs* I can relate to your guys’ experiences with people making fun of your food though. Whenever my mom packed me kimchi or any Korean food for lunch, I would be so cautious as I ate because my friends would ask me what it was with disgust. I would close my lid every time I took a bite. But in terms of clothing, I don’t think I ever wore my traditional outfits outside because I was worried about being judged. So I’m surprised you guys wore your cultural clothes outside when you were younger.

SS   Aw that makes me so sad to hear that, kids can definitely be cruel about those kinds of things. I feel like with cultural clothing when you’re young you don’t have as much shame about it and other peoples’ comments don’t affect you as much. And then you realize that it's somehow not cool anymore, and you try to suppress that part of yourself a little bit. And even now I still feel a little uncomfortable to go out in public with my cultural clothes on, out of the fear that I think I’ll be looked at differently.

RA   Yeah! I think clothing was definitely the first thing that I wanted to change, so that I could dress more like everyone else. My mom would always say just wear a kurta with jeans. But I would reject that thinking it looks too FOB-y. And so being able to take control of how I dressed, and starting to dress more Americanized, was definitely a step for me in feeling more comfortable, even though I was just conforming.


Korean (American)
Sarah  Have you ever felt that you’ve been treated differently because of your race?

Patricia  I think sometimes people expected me to be smarter in some subjects because I’m Asian. But overall I haven’t really experienced racism in college. When I was younger, a lot of people made insensitive comments. They would ask if I was Japanese or Chinese, even though I was Korean, or they would make fun of my culture. But I think now people are more accepting, so I don't experience racism as much. But maybe, I also don’t experience it as much because I surround myself with more Asians than other ethnicities, since I feel more comfortable with them. It’s possible that if I was in a more white-dominant community, my experience would be different, but I can't really speak to that.

Do you guys have any stories of when you were treated differently because of your race?

SS  It's weird because most of my friends are not of the same ethnicity or background as me. But I don't feel as if I’ve directly experienced racism, but I definitely notice when I'm the only brown person, more now than I used to.

Raziah  Sarah, did they ever make comments that just rubbed you the wrong way? Or a question for both of you, did you guys ever wish you were white?

PL  I think I did when I was in junior high because there was a certain way you had to look and dress in order to be popular. And I wanted to be like that. I thought I wasn’t a part of that group because I either looked too Korean, or I wasn’t playing a sport like most white people. But once I transferred to a more ethnically diverse high school, I didn’t have these thoughts and I became more appreciative of my own culture.

SS  I think maybe when I was younger, but I feel like now I'm embracing more of my identity and my skin color. And I'm pretty fine with how I am.

RA  That's good to hear! That’s such a nice place to be at in terms of your own identity.

PL  Yeah, that's a good way of thinking about it. I'm curious, what about you, Raziah?

RA   I would say, growing up I wanted to look more East Asian. Since I grew up in Malaysia, I wanted to look more like everyone else. And the beauty standard there was a blend of American/European and East Asian beauty standards. I didn’t like looking like me, because there was no way I could pass for either American or East Asian. It's just so funny though, because people there usually have flatter noses, so looking at me they would say, “it's good that you have a tall nose”. But people made fun of it too, because my nose was maybe too tall.

SS   So interesting.

RA   And I don't think I ever wanted to be white. I just wanted to have a smaller nose. Because I think that was the main characteristic of my culture that’s such a distinguishing factor. When people would see me without the hijab, they would tell me that I could pass for a white person if it wasn’t for my nose.

SS   Really?

RA   Yeah, besides the nose part though I just wanted to be able to go out more, and have that sense of freedom that I saw more white kids have. And I understand, we came from a different culture, so that wasn’t common for my parents.

SS   Yeah, it's the mentality of, “that's not what we do.”

RA   Yeah! And I also get a little bothered when people make curry jokes. It gets kinda upsetting, but also a little boring. *laughs* That’s all the jokes they can come up with. And as a kid, I would be that one brown kid that would just wear my cultural clothes and go play outside, no fucks given. And initially the other kids would say, “why does she dress like that?” and make comments about it. But also, a lot of it was just kids being kids, and I don't think it was ill-intended.

SS   Oh yeah, I definitely experienced a similar thing with curry comments. But going off of the cultural clothes thing, in elementary school when we had picture day I used to wear my cute Indian outfit sometimes.

RA   That’s so cute!

PL   That is adorable *laughs* I can relate to your guys’ experiences with people making fun of your food though. Whenever my mom packed me kimchi or any Korean food for lunch, I would be so cautious as I ate because my friends would ask me what it was with disgust. I would close my lid every time I took a bite. But in terms of clothing, I don’t think I ever wore my traditional outfits outside because I was worried about being judged. So I’m surprised you guys wore your cultural clothes outside when you were younger.

SS   Aw that makes me so sad to hear that, kids can definitely be cruel about those kinds of things. I feel like with cultural clothing when you’re young you don’t have as much shame about it and other peoples’ comments don’t affect you as much. And then you realize that it's somehow not cool anymore, and you try to suppress that part of yourself a little bit. And even now I still feel a little uncomfortable to go out in public with my cultural clothes on, out of the fear that I think I’ll be looked at differently.

RA   Yeah! I think clothing was definitely the first thing that I wanted to change, so that I could dress more like everyone else. My mom would always say just wear a kurta with jeans. But I would reject that thinking it looks too FOB-y. And so being able to take control of how I dressed, and starting to dress more Americanized, was definitely a step for me in feeling more comfortable, even though I was just conforming.


Ethnic Ambiguity
Sarah  Have you ever felt that you’ve been treated differently because of your race?

Patricia  I think sometimes people expected me to be smarter in some subjects because I’m Asian. But overall I haven’t really experienced racism in college. When I was younger, a lot of people made insensitive comments. They would ask if I was Japanese or Chinese, even though I was Korean, or they would make fun of my culture. But I think now people are more accepting, so I don't experience racism as much. But maybe, I also don’t experience it as much because I surround myself with more Asians than other ethnicities, since I feel more comfortable with them. It’s possible that if I was in a more white-dominant community, my experience would be different, but I can't really speak to that.

Do you guys have any stories of when you were treated differently because of your race?

SS  It's weird because most of my friends are not of the same ethnicity or background as me. But I don't feel as if I’ve directly experienced racism, but I definitely notice when I'm the only brown person, more now than I used to.

Raziah  Sarah, did they ever make comments that just rubbed you the wrong way? Or a question for both of you, did you guys ever wish you were white?

PL  I think I did when I was in junior high because there was a certain way you had to look and dress in order to be popular. And I wanted to be like that. I thought I wasn’t a part of that group because I either looked too Korean, or I wasn’t playing a sport like most white people. But once I transferred to a more ethnically diverse high school, I didn’t have these thoughts and I became more appreciative of my own culture.

SS  I think maybe when I was younger, but I feel like now I'm embracing more of my identity and my skin color. And I'm pretty fine with how I am.

RA  That's good to hear! That’s such a nice place to be at in terms of your own identity.

PL  Yeah, that's a good way of thinking about it. I'm curious, what about you, Raziah?

RA   I would say, growing up I wanted to look more East Asian. Since I grew up in Malaysia, I wanted to look more like everyone else. And the beauty standard there was a blend of American/European and East Asian beauty standards. I didn’t like looking like me, because there was no way I could pass for either American or East Asian. It's just so funny though, because people there usually have flatter noses, so looking at me they would say, “it's good that you have a tall nose”. But people made fun of it too, because my nose was maybe too tall.

SS   So interesting.

RA   And I don't think I ever wanted to be white. I just wanted to have a smaller nose. Because I think that was the main characteristic of my culture that’s such a distinguishing factor. When people would see me without the hijab, they would tell me that I could pass for a white person if it wasn’t for my nose.

SS   Really?

RA   Yeah, besides the nose part though I just wanted to be able to go out more, and have that sense of freedom that I saw more white kids have. And I understand, we came from a different culture, so that wasn’t common for my parents.

SS   Yeah, it's the mentality of, “that's not what we do.”

RA   Yeah! And I also get a little bothered when people make curry jokes. It gets kinda upsetting, but also a little boring. *laughs* That’s all the jokes they can come up with. And as a kid, I would be that one brown kid that would just wear my cultural clothes and go play outside, no fucks given. And initially the other kids would say, “why does she dress like that?” and make comments about it. But also, a lot of it was just kids being kids, and I don't think it was ill-intended.

SS   Oh yeah, I definitely experienced a similar thing with curry comments. But going off of the cultural clothes thing, in elementary school when we had picture day I used to wear my cute Indian outfit sometimes.

RA   That’s so cute!

PL   That is adorable *laughs* I can relate to your guys’ experiences with people making fun of your food though. Whenever my mom packed me kimchi or any Korean food for lunch, I would be so cautious as I ate because my friends would ask me what it was with disgust. I would close my lid every time I took a bite. But in terms of clothing, I don’t think I ever wore my traditional outfits outside because I was worried about being judged. So I’m surprised you guys wore your cultural clothes outside when you were younger.

SS   Aw that makes me so sad to hear that, kids can definitely be cruel about those kinds of things. I feel like with cultural clothing when you’re young you don’t have as much shame about it and other peoples’ comments don’t affect you as much. And then you realize that it's somehow not cool anymore, and you try to suppress that part of yourself a little bit. And even now I still feel a little uncomfortable to go out in public with my cultural clothes on, out of the fear that I think I’ll be looked at differently.

RA   Yeah! I think clothing was definitely the first thing that I wanted to change, so that I could dress more like everyone else. My mom would always say just wear a kurta with jeans. But I would reject that thinking it looks too FOB-y. And so being able to take control of how I dressed, and starting to dress more Americanized, was definitely a step for me in feeling more comfortable, even though I was just conforming.


Marriage & Migration
Sarah  Have you ever felt that you’ve been treated differently because of your race?

Patricia  I think sometimes people expected me to be smarter in some subjects because I’m Asian. But overall I haven’t really experienced racism in college. When I was younger, a lot of people made insensitive comments. They would ask if I was Japanese or Chinese, even though I was Korean, or they would make fun of my culture. But I think now people are more accepting, so I don't experience racism as much. But maybe, I also don’t experience it as much because I surround myself with more Asians than other ethnicities, since I feel more comfortable with them. It’s possible that if I was in a more white-dominant community, my experience would be different, but I can't really speak to that.

Do you guys have any stories of when you were treated differently because of your race?

SS  It's weird because most of my friends are not of the same ethnicity or background as me. But I don't feel as if I’ve directly experienced racism, but I definitely notice when I'm the only brown person, more now than I used to.

Raziah  Sarah, did they ever make comments that just rubbed you the wrong way? Or a question for both of you, did you guys ever wish you were white?

PL  I think I did when I was in junior high because there was a certain way you had to look and dress in order to be popular. And I wanted to be like that. I thought I wasn’t a part of that group because I either looked too Korean, or I wasn’t playing a sport like most white people. But once I transferred to a more ethnically diverse high school, I didn’t have these thoughts and I became more appreciative of my own culture.

SS  I think maybe when I was younger, but I feel like now I'm embracing more of my identity and my skin color. And I'm pretty fine with how I am.

RA  That's good to hear! That’s such a nice place to be at in terms of your own identity.

PL  Yeah, that's a good way of thinking about it. I'm curious, what about you, Raziah?

RA   I would say, growing up I wanted to look more East Asian. Since I grew up in Malaysia, I wanted to look more like everyone else. And the beauty standard there was a blend of American/European and East Asian beauty standards. I didn’t like looking like me, because there was no way I could pass for either American or East Asian. It's just so funny though, because people there usually have flatter noses, so looking at me they would say, “it's good that you have a tall nose”. But people made fun of it too, because my nose was maybe too tall.

SS   So interesting.

RA   And I don't think I ever wanted to be white. I just wanted to have a smaller nose. Because I think that was the main characteristic of my culture that’s such a distinguishing factor. When people would see me without the hijab, they would tell me that I could pass for a white person if it wasn’t for my nose.

SS   Really?

RA   Yeah, besides the nose part though I just wanted to be able to go out more, and have that sense of freedom that I saw more white kids have. And I understand, we came from a different culture, so that wasn’t common for my parents.

SS   Yeah, it's the mentality of, “that's not what we do.”

RA   Yeah! And I also get a little bothered when people make curry jokes. It gets kinda upsetting, but also a little boring. *laughs* That’s all the jokes they can come up with. And as a kid, I would be that one brown kid that would just wear my cultural clothes and go play outside, no fucks given. And initially the other kids would say, “why does she dress like that?” and make comments about it. But also, a lot of it was just kids being kids, and I don't think it was ill-intended.

SS   Oh yeah, I definitely experienced a similar thing with curry comments. But going off of the cultural clothes thing, in elementary school when we had picture day I used to wear my cute Indian outfit sometimes.

RA   That’s so cute!

PL   That is adorable *laughs* I can relate to your guys’ experiences with people making fun of your food though. Whenever my mom packed me kimchi or any Korean food for lunch, I would be so cautious as I ate because my friends would ask me what it was with disgust. I would close my lid every time I took a bite. But in terms of clothing, I don’t think I ever wore my traditional outfits outside because I was worried about being judged. So I’m surprised you guys wore your cultural clothes outside when you were younger.

SS   Aw that makes me so sad to hear that, kids can definitely be cruel about those kinds of things. I feel like with cultural clothing when you’re young you don’t have as much shame about it and other peoples’ comments don’t affect you as much. And then you realize that it's somehow not cool anymore, and you try to suppress that part of yourself a little bit. And even now I still feel a little uncomfortable to go out in public with my cultural clothes on, out of the fear that I think I’ll be looked at differently.

RA   Yeah! I think clothing was definitely the first thing that I wanted to change, so that I could dress more like everyone else. My mom would always say just wear a kurta with jeans. But I would reject that thinking it looks too FOB-y. And so being able to take control of how I dressed, and starting to dress more Americanized, was definitely a step for me in feeling more comfortable, even though I was just conforming.


Third culture kids
Sarah  Have you ever felt that you’ve been treated differently because of your race?

Patricia  I think sometimes people expected me to be smarter in some subjects because I’m Asian. But overall I haven’t really experienced racism in college. When I was younger, a lot of people made insensitive comments. They would ask if I was Japanese or Chinese, even though I was Korean, or they would make fun of my culture. But I think now people are more accepting, so I don't experience racism as much. But maybe, I also don’t experience it as much because I surround myself with more Asians than other ethnicities, since I feel more comfortable with them. It’s possible that if I was in a more white-dominant community, my experience would be different, but I can't really speak to that.

Do you guys have any stories of when you were treated differently because of your race?

SS  It's weird because most of my friends are not of the same ethnicity or background as me. But I don't feel as if I’ve directly experienced racism, but I definitely notice when I'm the only brown person, more now than I used to.

Raziah  Sarah, did they ever make comments that just rubbed you the wrong way? Or a question for both of you, did you guys ever wish you were white?

PL  I think I did when I was in junior high because there was a certain way you had to look and dress in order to be popular. And I wanted to be like that. I thought I wasn’t a part of that group because I either looked too Korean, or I wasn’t playing a sport like most white people. But once I transferred to a more ethnically diverse high school, I didn’t have these thoughts and I became more appreciative of my own culture.

SS  I think maybe when I was younger, but I feel like now I'm embracing more of my identity and my skin color. And I'm pretty fine with how I am.

RA  That's good to hear! That’s such a nice place to be at in terms of your own identity.

PL  Yeah, that's a good way of thinking about it. I'm curious, what about you, Raziah?

RA   I would say, growing up I wanted to look more East Asian. Since I grew up in Malaysia, I wanted to look more like everyone else. And the beauty standard there was a blend of American/European and East Asian beauty standards. I didn’t like looking like me, because there was no way I could pass for either American or East Asian. It's just so funny though, because people there usually have flatter noses, so looking at me they would say, “it's good that you have a tall nose”. But people made fun of it too, because my nose was maybe too tall.

SS   So interesting.

RA   And I don't think I ever wanted to be white. I just wanted to have a smaller nose. Because I think that was the main characteristic of my culture that’s such a distinguishing factor. When people would see me without the hijab, they would tell me that I could pass for a white person if it wasn’t for my nose.

SS   Really?

RA   Yeah, besides the nose part though I just wanted to be able to go out more, and have that sense of freedom that I saw more white kids have. And I understand, we came from a different culture, so that wasn’t common for my parents.

SS   Yeah, it's the mentality of, “that's not what we do.”

RA   Yeah! And I also get a little bothered when people make curry jokes. It gets kinda upsetting, but also a little boring. *laughs* That’s all the jokes they can come up with. And as a kid, I would be that one brown kid that would just wear my cultural clothes and go play outside, no fucks given. And initially the other kids would say, “why does she dress like that?” and make comments about it. But also, a lot of it was just kids being kids, and I don't think it was ill-intended.

SS   Oh yeah, I definitely experienced a similar thing with curry comments. But going off of the cultural clothes thing, in elementary school when we had picture day I used to wear my cute Indian outfit sometimes.

RA   That’s so cute!

PL   That is adorable *laughs* I can relate to your guys’ experiences with people making fun of your food though. Whenever my mom packed me kimchi or any Korean food for lunch, I would be so cautious as I ate because my friends would ask me what it was with disgust. I would close my lid every time I took a bite. But in terms of clothing, I don’t think I ever wore my traditional outfits outside because I was worried about being judged. So I’m surprised you guys wore your cultural clothes outside when you were younger.

SS   Aw that makes me so sad to hear that, kids can definitely be cruel about those kinds of things. I feel like with cultural clothing when you’re young you don’t have as much shame about it and other peoples’ comments don’t affect you as much. And then you realize that it's somehow not cool anymore, and you try to suppress that part of yourself a little bit. And even now I still feel a little uncomfortable to go out in public with my cultural clothes on, out of the fear that I think I’ll be looked at differently.

RA   Yeah! I think clothing was definitely the first thing that I wanted to change, so that I could dress more like everyone else. My mom would always say just wear a kurta with jeans. But I would reject that thinking it looks too FOB-y. And so being able to take control of how I dressed, and starting to dress more Americanized, was definitely a step for me in feeling more comfortable, even though I was just conforming.


Third culture kids
Sarah  Have you ever felt that you’ve been treated differently because of your race?

Patricia  I think sometimes people expected me to be smarter in some subjects because I’m Asian. But overall I haven’t really experienced racism in college. When I was younger, a lot of people made insensitive comments. They would ask if I was Japanese or Chinese, even though I was Korean, or they would make fun of my culture. But I think now people are more accepting, so I don't experience racism as much. But maybe, I also don’t experience it as much because I surround myself with more Asians than other ethnicities, since I feel more comfortable with them. It’s possible that if I was in a more white-dominant community, my experience would be different, but I can't really speak to that.

Do you guys have any stories of when you were treated differently because of your race?

SS  It's weird because most of my friends are not of the same ethnicity or background as me. But I don't feel as if I’ve directly experienced racism, but I definitely notice when I'm the only brown person, more now than I used to.

Raziah  Sarah, did they ever make comments that just rubbed you the wrong way? Or a question for both of you, did you guys ever wish you were white?

PL  I think I did when I was in junior high because there was a certain way you had to look and dress in order to be popular. And I wanted to be like that. I thought I wasn’t a part of that group because I either looked too Korean, or I wasn’t playing a sport like most white people. But once I transferred to a more ethnically diverse high school, I didn’t have these thoughts and I became more appreciative of my own culture.

SS  I think maybe when I was younger, but I feel like now I'm embracing more of my identity and my skin color. And I'm pretty fine with how I am.

RA  That's good to hear! That’s such a nice place to be at in terms of your own identity.

PL  Yeah, that's a good way of thinking about it. I'm curious, what about you, Raziah?

RA   I would say, growing up I wanted to look more East Asian. Since I grew up in Malaysia, I wanted to look more like everyone else. And the beauty standard there was a blend of American/European and East Asian beauty standards. I didn’t like looking like me, because there was no way I could pass for either American or East Asian. It's just so funny though, because people there usually have flatter noses, so looking at me they would say, “it's good that you have a tall nose”. But people made fun of it too, because my nose was maybe too tall.

SS   So interesting.

RA   And I don't think I ever wanted to be white. I just wanted to have a smaller nose. Because I think that was the main characteristic of my culture that’s such a distinguishing factor. When people would see me without the hijab, they would tell me that I could pass for a white person if it wasn’t for my nose.

SS   Really?

RA   Yeah, besides the nose part though I just wanted to be able to go out more, and have that sense of freedom that I saw more white kids have. And I understand, we came from a different culture, so that wasn’t common for my parents.

SS   Yeah, it's the mentality of, “that's not what we do.”

RA   Yeah! And I also get a little bothered when people make curry jokes. It gets kinda upsetting, but also a little boring. *laughs* That’s all the jokes they can come up with. And as a kid, I would be that one brown kid that would just wear my cultural clothes and go play outside, no fucks given. And initially the other kids would say, “why does she dress like that?” and make comments about it. But also, a lot of it was just kids being kids, and I don't think it was ill-intended.

SS   Oh yeah, I definitely experienced a similar thing with curry comments. But going off of the cultural clothes thing, in elementary school when we had picture day I used to wear my cute Indian outfit sometimes.

RA   That’s so cute!

PL   That is adorable *laughs* I can relate to your guys’ experiences with people making fun of your food though. Whenever my mom packed me kimchi or any Korean food for lunch, I would be so cautious as I ate because my friends would ask me what it was with disgust. I would close my lid every time I took a bite. But in terms of clothing, I don’t think I ever wore my traditional outfits outside because I was worried about being judged. So I’m surprised you guys wore your cultural clothes outside when you were younger.

SS   Aw that makes me so sad to hear that, kids can definitely be cruel about those kinds of things. I feel like with cultural clothing when you’re young you don’t have as much shame about it and other peoples’ comments don’t affect you as much. And then you realize that it's somehow not cool anymore, and you try to suppress that part of yourself a little bit. And even now I still feel a little uncomfortable to go out in public with my cultural clothes on, out of the fear that I think I’ll be looked at differently.

RA   Yeah! I think clothing was definitely the first thing that I wanted to change, so that I could dress more like everyone else. My mom would always say just wear a kurta with jeans. But I would reject that thinking it looks too FOB-y. And so being able to take control of how I dressed, and starting to dress more Americanized, was definitely a step for me in feeling more comfortable, even though I was just conforming.


Through this conversation the three of us were able to empathize and connect with each other’s struggles and reiterate the importance of embracing our identities. While we may not have all the answers to how we can each balance our different cultural identities, knowing that each of us is going through similar struggles has helped us feel less alone.

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